Dia de los Muertos ~ How will YOU celebrate YOUR ancestors?

Dia de los Muertos ~ How will YOU celebrate YOUR ancestors?

Today, November 2, is Dia de los Muertos. 

It is a time when families gather to honor and remember deceased loved ones. It is believed that the souls of the dead return to visit the living families in homes, businesses and cemeteries. 

Anything can be placed on the altar for the visiting souls, including traditional food, fresh flowers, pan de muerto (or bread for the dead), candles,  copal incense (aromatic tree resin), fruits, cloths, photographs, favorite drinks of the deceased, sugar folk toys, religious images and clothing. 

Decorations also include tombstones, skulls and skeletons made of clay and other materials, sugar skulls, and papel picado. Calaveras are ubiquitous during Day of the Dead. A Calavera, or sugar skull, is a decorative skulls made (usually by hand) from either sugar (called Alfeñiques) or clay which are used in the Mexican celebration of the Day of the Dead. The skulls are often drawn with a smile as to laugh at death itself and the name of each departed is written on a sugar skull. 

The names of the living are also written on these treats to introduce children to the idea of death in an atmosphere of joyful celebration. These sugar skulls are eaten and the living come to associate pleasant sensations with the sadness of death. 

Calaveras take many forms, such as sugar candies, clay decorations, and most memorable: face painting. Sugar skulls are decorated and placed on ofrendas of loved ones. 

Most importantly, a photograph of the departed soul is placed on the altar. Pan de muerto, bread for the dead, is sweet and baked in shapes of skulls and human figures. 

Traditional loaves are round with a central raised knob of dough, representing the skull, with crossed bone-shaped decorations radiating from the central knob. 

Día de los Muertos also includes traditional dishes, such as chicken in red or black mole sprinkled with sesame seeds; tortillas, tamales made from ground corn; soft drinks or aguardiente (“white-lightning” liquor),tequila and always a glass of water. It is believed that the returning souls are thirsty after a long journey. Water is also believed to be a main support of life. 

The flower of the dead is called Cempasúchil (Náhuatl, or Aztec, name for marigold) or “Flor de Muerto” (Spanish for Flower of Dead) and symbolizes the beauty and fragility of life. Cempasúchil was the symbolic flower of death for the Aztecs, because once it is cut, it dies very quickly. 

Marigolds are believed to be the pathways that guide the spirits to their ofrendas. The flower’s vibrant colors and scent attract the departed souls, as they return to feast on their favorite foods. While orange and yellow marigolds are the main flowers, magenta terciopelo (ruby coxcombs) and nube (baby’s breath) are also traditionally displayed. 

Copal (tree resin) is used as incense and is a symbolic transformation of the physical to the supernatural, associated with the death of the soul returning to the ofrenda. 

Candles and fresh marigold flowers are placed on the altar to light and guide the way of the souls to the altar. Paths are marked with flower petals showing the departed souls the way to the altar. Day of the Dead toys are also placed on the altar. Painted clay skeleton figures portray the dead resuming their normal activities such as playing. Pull toys, coffins and crank boxes are displayed for the dead to play with. Living with death in this way means that we can learn learn to accept death as part of life. 

(Sources: Day of the Dead Festival & Day of the Dead Holiday) 

How will YOU celebrate YOUR ancestors?

My Response to a Particularly Offensive Narrow-Minded Article

My Response to a Particularly Offensive Narrow-Minded Article

Follow the link to this article, then return here to read my response. I'm not asking for cudos or anything, just wanted you to see another point of view than you may have or know that others have.

This is my response:

The author of this one is a winner. Love it when those uneducated on a particular subject matter try to scream their holier-than-thou self-righteousness from the rooftops regarding said subject to which they know nothing about. If you want to believe something, then at least believe something that has fact attached to it somewhere, not based exclusively on the opinion(s) of others who also don't know the facts, but only twisted half-truths on to full lies about the subject.
So, the subject of this article is about Hallowe'en and it's "evilness", that it celebrates death and darkness, and other ridiculous matter ad nauseum. I will address each of her points directly:

"As I grew closer to the Lord and gained more knowledge of His Word, I began to feel convicted about Halloween."
GOOD. If something doesn't feel right to you, then you should most certainly not continue on with it.

"God is a God of life, but Halloween focuses on death. Should I celebrate a holiday where people decorate their front yards with tombstones?"
Ok, first of all, Hallowe'en doesn't "focus on death". Hallowe'en is the modern day commercialized joke that was once a celebration of the last harvest of the season. The ancient Celts called this time Samhain (pronounced SOW-en) and believed that the veil between the living and the ancestors who had passed was thinnest, so they could come visit. It was a time to celebrate those who had passed, not dwell of "death" and the dead in any morbid sense. THAT is what those who do not understand this concept have confused themselves and others about. "Death" isn't an end, it is just another state of beginning.

"The Scriptures tell us to put away deeds of darkness (Rom.13:12) and that light has nothing in common with darkness (2 Cor. 6:14). Is celebrating a dark holiday something a child of the light should be doing?"
Again, it is not a "dark holiday". In fact, it is one of the Cross Quarter Festivals, one of the Fire Festivals, a celebration of the sun and its life giving light. While it is the only one of the Fire Festivals celebrated at night, that is so the people may visit with those ancestors who've passed and to wish them well upon their return at dawn. There is nothing scary or morbid about it. It is family visiting with family. It is a time of honoring your ancestors, not "zombie" attacks & tombstones.

"I had been delivered from fear and panic attacks and knew that fear comes from the enemy. Should I participate in a holiday that has fear as its very foundation?"
That "fear factor"? THAT is straight up Hollywood bs. There is nothing to fear about those of our relatives & ancestors who have passed. We honor their memories, say prayers to them of gratitude for their love, and sorrow at their passing, but know that they are alive and well where ever they now reside on the Otherside.

"Witchcraft is clearly detestable to the Lord (Deut 18:10-13). Shouldn't something that glorifies witchcraft (just take a walk through the Halloween store) be detestable to me as well?"
LMAO Wow, so uneducated here. Hallowe'en stores have absolutely nothing, and I mean NOTHING to do with witchcraft in any way, shape or form. This is typical of someone who has no clue how to do research and when they do (as the author obviously does) they read only what is written & pushed by those of the same thinking but who also have never done their research. Let me put it this way; if I wanted to know about other religions and faith systems, would I read what those of my faith wrote (who never studied and lived the other systems) or would I read the teachings of those who live that faith system every day - just as they do theirs? I don't go to the baker to have my car fixed, or the coffee shop to buy computer ink. Neither should you learn about a subject from those who don't have any education on the subject. You won't be "converted". You'll be EDUCATED. It won't hold true for you, but at least you'll have a broader view and will understand where they're coming from. Rather than that narrow, thin line that is actually impossible to tow. Narrow mindedness is NOT a virtue.

"Halloween is a sacred, high holiday for Wiccans (the official religion of witchcraft). Is this a holiday Christians should celebrate alongside Wiccans?"
Her un-educated lack of knowledge is showing fully here. Wicca is NOT, I repeat NOT "the official religion of witchcraft". It is just one of many Pagan Traditions just as there are many denominations of the Christian religion, various sects of the Jewish and the Vedic, etc. There is no all-encompassing "one" for Pagans as there are not for Christians.

"Is it cute when we dress our kids like the devil (or witches, ghouls, scary characters, etc.)? Isn't it, well, demonic?"
Wow. Just. Wow. The uneducated ignorance here is beyond astounding, especially considering the fact that "the truth is out there" and so easily researched and learned. AGAIN, not to "convert". Only to EDUCATE.

"What if my child dresses in a wholesome fireman costume? Romans 16:19 says that we need to be wise to what is good and innocent of evil. If I let him participate in Halloween, even while dressed as a fireman, aren't I sending him a mixed message by allowing him to participate in a celebration of evil?"
If you choose to not let your children participate in fun & games, that's your prerogative as a parent, but don't twist the truth to fit your agenda, rather than tell them the reality of "why"; which is that YOU'RE not comfortable with it and so you will not participate or allow them to. But to spread the twisted lies about it being "a celebration of evil" is poor parenting. Because when they get old enough to learn how to do research - they'll learn, and you'll be called a liar. Not cool - for you or for them.

"The Lord said in 2 Cor. 6:17, "Come out from them and be separate ... Touch no unclean thing ..." Doesn't God want His children to be set apart from the world and from sin and evil? Aren't we supposed to be peculiar people?"
If you want to be "set apart", then do so (and good luck with that), but don't keep propagating twisted half-truths and lies to fit the agenda. Simply state, "it's not within the realm of my beliefs, and I'm not comfortable with it." Period. Don't push an agenda built for the last six centuries on lies. It was uptight, prudish, FEARFUL men who in their fear of the unknown decided to make it a "heresy" or "evil" and a "sin" to even consider having anything to do with anyone else who does. Is that REALLY the way to work to convince those "evil people" that your way is actually right? Alienate them through lies like this article and you'll look just as fruity as the author. (Newbies or reformed anyone in anything are always the worst, always spouting loudly in their self-righteousness.) I prefer those who are strong enough and self-confident enough in their own faith that they don't need to spout loudly. They're actions speak clearly. They walk the talk. Not talk the talk - as the author of this article so obviously does.

"My extended family thinks it's ridiculous that we not allow our son to dress up for Halloween. Should their opinions matter to me more than God's? Shouldn't pleasing God be my utmost concern?"
YES! Absolutely! It shouldn't matter what others think. But remember to put the shoe on the other foot, or you'll be just another religious fruitcake with nothing valid worth listening to.

If there is even a question in my heart and mind that it might be wrong, shouldn't that be my first clue? Why would I continue to do so with even a lingering thought that it is wrong?
Your belief is your own, and there is nothing wrong with that. But others have their beliefs, and there also is nothing wrong with that. Educate yourself on those Paths you know nothing about. Hold a conversation with those of other faiths. LEARN something! You won't be converted. Your won't be sinning. You'll be able to hold your own in a conversation on Faith and the Divine. As long as there is belief in something Greater than ourselves, then there is always hope that we will come to an equal understanding. And agree to disagree.

"Does Halloween bring glory to God? No! It glorifies the devil! Nuff said."
Ugh. Brain dead, self-righteous, newbie, loud-mouthed fundie. "Nuff said".

An Article Review on One's View of Heaven (and Hell)

An Article Review on One's View of Heaven (and Hell)
I read an article this morning about a Christian philosopher's view on the movie "Heaven is for Real". The man's name is Dr. William Lane Craig. The article was entitled "Philosopher Warns of Danger in Believing Stories About People Nearly Dying and Going to Heaven".

Either read the article first and return here, or read this and then read the article. Regardless of the order, DO read the article I'm referring to, this way you can have an accurate view of your own and not just mine. And honestly, I would love to have some feedback on this one.

Dr. Craig "is concerned that stories of supposed heavenly encounters during near-death experiences could lead Christians to stray from biblical teachings about the afterlife." While he "believes that some accounts of children and adults experiencing the divine during life-threatening health scares could be true, he has some reservations."

I'll reiterate that last part, "he has some reservations". "HE"?? I'm sorry, but who the fuck is "HE" to determine what someone else has or has not experienced??

He then goes on to say, "...there are elements of some of them that make me think that they often involve a kind of filtering through a person’s own frame of thought." Uh, duh. And isn't his own view of heaven based on the same personal reference, i.e. "frame of thought"?

He apparently has a "fear" that some Christians "might begin basing their views on the afterlife more on popular books and movies, like Heave Is Real, than on the Bible." Wow, worried much that the sheeple might find their own pasture to graze in that isn't so overflowing with manure that they feel it's time to spread out a bit, see what else there is over the hill? Can't have anyone in the fold wandering too far, we might have a mass exodus on our hands. And those leaving just might actually find their own cleaner, greener pastures elsewhere. When the shit gets thick it's time to get out of the muck or you'll be mired in it forever.

His next statement kills me, "For the Christian believer, he has in the Bible an authoritative guide to the afterlife that should determine his thinking about this,” OMFG! Are you serious?? Those two words, "authoritative" and "determine", tell me everything I need to know about this man and his method of teaching and preaching. And I want no part of it! The Bible is a guide from which to base your morals, ethics, and style of living. Its words have power and beauty. But it is not a "dictator" on how to live or believe. Each person must, for themselves, find God, the Divine, the Creator, or whatever name you and It have agreed upon. Knowing God is extremely personal, and no one may dictate how you must believe in It.

Then he states, "He didn’t dismiss the story behind “Heaven Is for Real,” a book and film based on Colton Burpo’s claim that he met dead relatives and Jesus during an emergency appendectomy in 2003. That said, Craig cautioned Christians not to shut off their critical thinking faculties simply because a story feels good and seems plausible." (my emphasis) 

"Shut off their critical thinking faculties"...LMAO Wow, the pot calling the kettle black. That is exactly what he is doing. Thankfully, I do have those skills and that is the reason I am writing this. Because his arrogance pissed me off so much.

This next sentence kills me, "Craig said that in his interpretation of the Bible’s teachings about death, a person’s soul is separated from their body when they die, leaving them as a spiritual, not physical, being." BINGO! We have a winner! Quote, "IN HIS INTERPRETATION..." I now refer you back to the previous paragraph about "critical thinking". If you were to follow statement number 2 ("his interpretation"), then statement number 1 ("critical thinking faculties") becomes an oxymoron. Wow. He's not the brightest bulb in the box is he? At the least, he's an unwitting hypocrite.

"Craig said that in his view, heaven and hell haven’t necessarily occurred yet, and won’t until the “end times” conclude..." Ok, from his and other Christian's viewpoints, I concur (to a point) on this one. The problem with the statement though is it being "in his view". Exactly! HIS view.

The article goes on, "He posited that Burpo and others might have experienced a God-given mental projection, but that they are not actually experiencing heaven as a literal place, nor are they seeing embodied spirits." And who exactly is he to determine who or what these people are seeing?? Was he there, inside their experience? Did he see and experience what they did, as they did? No. He's "positing" from his view, which is full of personal prejudices honed over years of his experiences that are only based upon having never experienced a "near-death experience". Which means his views are null and void.

"Instead, he believes that (they) are seeing disembodied spirits who are in a waiting place called “paradise.” There it is again, "he believes". Ugh. Really? Wow, you know what I believe? I believe this is a blowhard who wants his 15 minutes in the limelight, but like most others like him, he can't hold up his end of the argument.

"Paradise and its oppositional locality — hades — precede heaven and hell and are the spiritual realms where believers reside until they are reunited with their bodies at the end of times, he said." Ooookaaaaay! Wow. Whatever. I really can't find words to express my awe of the stupidity of that statement.

"...at the end of the world, on judgement day, God would raise the bodies of the dead and the souls would be reunited with …supernatural bodies.

From there it goes on to say, "That in mind, the philosopher said that Burpo and others might have actually seen projections of the spirits — images that God was allowing. What we cannot say as Christians is that [Burpo] was literally seeing his grandfather in a physical sense, because his [deceased] grandfather doesn’t have his body,” he continued. “You don’t go to heaven when you die. That sounds jarring … you don’t go to heaven or hell until after the resurrection.”

Ok, let me get this straight. God is only "allowing" people to see their dead relatives as "projections", but they're not really there because God hasn't given them their "spiritual body" yet. OMG WTF does he think that "projection" is, if not their "spiritual body"? What a bunch of convoluted twisted nonsense. He needs to take a course in critical thinking, because he has none.

This next statement is really good! "...he’s hoping to advance a positive and sympathetic look at stories like Burpos to help people realize that some digging and clarifying needs to be done to bring the stories in compliance with Christian teaching." Wow, there's that dictatorial bullshit again, "in compliance"? Seriously?? Holy shit. I mean, really? Un-fucking-believable.

"The title of the book, for instance — “Heaven Is for Real” — Craig called a “contradiction,” as he clearly believes heaven hasn’t yet come to fruition." Again, he believes. HIS beliefs on the subject.

Here is another article, by Dr. Craig himself, on the subject. Much of what is in the article I read and am referencing here, comes from this article by Dr. Craig. I won't bother breaking it down. This one was more than enough to piss me off for one day, thank you.

I really have a hard time with those who are supposed to be spiritual leaders in their faith. But rather than guiding, they take the term "leader" to heart and begin to dictate that which others are supposed to believe.

Why can't they just teach the words, in context, and let those who read them learn from them as they interpret them? What you may take from a verse or phrase is different from what I or someone else will get from it.

You can't tell me how to see God. I have to see God in my own way. I have to come to meet with the Creator in my time and in my own manner. It may be through the wind in the trees as they talk to me. It may be that tingly feeling you get when you feel the Divine is near and thus you know God is listening.

I don't know about you, but I do not need someone else telling (yes, dictating to) me how to experience anything spiritual. My beliefs will determine what I see on the Otherside. Yours will determine what you see and experience.

Years ago, I saw a show on cable (long before there were all these hundreds of cable channels), a show about death, dying, and experiences of those who had come back to tell their stories. There was a Christian man who had experienced dreams his whole life of being a Jewish concentration camp victim who was killed in the gas chamber. He even dreamt of his dying and just-after-death moments. Upon his death he saw a blue light which transported him toward it. But even in his dream state he wondered by he saw a blue light. Wasn't it supposed to be a white light?

He decided to do some research regarding the man he saw himself to be in his dreams, and the Jewish faith's beliefs on the subject of dying and passing over. He spoke with a Rabbi, telling him of his experiences in these dreams, and the blue light. As a Christian he couldn't understand why the light was blue and not white. The Rabbi told him that in the Jewish faith, the light is indeed blue!

This then becomes apropos regarding Dr. Craig's statement "....they often involve a kind of filtering through a person’s own frame of thought." Exactly. Each person's "own frame of thought". As a Christian he would've seen a white light. But as the Jewish believer he was experiencing in his dream state, he saw a blue light. If he'd dreamt of a Viking, it's then fair to say that he would've seen the Valkyries and the Halls of Valhalla. Or if he'd dreamt of a Pagan he would've seen the Summerland.

Isn't it time to stop dictating how we should believe in the Divine, and only be glad that we do?

Lesson 8: Afterlife Quotes, Jokes & Humor

Lesson 8: Afterlife Quotes, Jokes & Humor

Quotes

Life is Hard, and then you Die. -- A Coffee Cup

What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us; what we have done for others and the world remains and is immortal. --Albert Pike

If I think more about death than some other people, it is probably because I love life more than they do. --Angelina Jolie

For certain is death for the born And certain is birth for the dead; Therefore over this Thou shouldst not grieve. -- Bhagavad Gita

Fear not death, for the sooner we die the longer we shall be immortal. --Benjamin Franklin

Anything I've ever done that ultimately was worthwhile initially scared me to death. --Betty Bender

Death borders upon our birth, and our cradle stands in the grave. Our birth is nothing but our death begun. --Bishop Hall

What we commonly call death does not destroy the body, it only causes a separation of spirit and body. --Brigham Young

Death is the most beautiful adventure in life. --Charles Frohman

If Easter says anything to us today, it says this: You can put truth in a grave, but it won't stay there. You can nail it to a cross, wrap it in winding sheets and shut it up in a tomb, but it will rise! --Clarence W. Hall

If man hasn't discovered something that he will die for, he isn't fit to live. --Dr. Martin Luther King

Some men are alive simply because it is against the law to kill them. --Edward W. Howe

Men fear death, as children fear to go in the dark; and as that natural fear in children is increased with tales, so is the other. --Francis Bacon

Death smiles at us all and all a man can do is smile back. --Gladiator (film)

Dying seems less sad than having lived too little. --Gloria Steinem

You might be a king or a little street sweeper, but sooner or later you'll dance with the reaper. -- Grim Reaper's rap from Bill & Teds Bogus Journey

That is not dead which can eternal lie, yet with strange eons, even Death may die. --H. P. Lovecraft

Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome. --Isaac Asimov

Death ends a life, not a relationship. --Jack Lemmon

Death Valley is neither dead nor a valley. --Jerry Bunin

Make sure to send a lazy man the angel of death. --Jewish Proverb

Nothing is certain but death and taxes. Of the two, taxes happen annually. --Joel Fox

Fear; if allowed free rein, would reduce all of us to trembling shadows of men, for whom only death could bring release. --John M. Wilson

Death (or its allusion) makes men precious and pathetic. They are moving because of their phantom condition; every act they execute may be their last; there is not a face that is not on the verge of dissolving like a face in a dream. --Jorge Luis Borges

A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic. --Joseph Stalin

Birth and Death are the two noblest expressions of bravery. --Kahlil Gibran

Ancient Egyptians believed that upon death they would be asked two questions and their answers would determine whether they could continue their journey in the afterlife. The first question was, "Did you bring joy?" The second was, "Did you find joy?" --Leo Buscaglia

Death and taxes and childbirth! There's never any convenient time for any of them. --Margaret Mitchell

It is foolish to be afraid of death. Just think. No more repaired tires on the body vehicle, no more patchwork living. --Paramhansa Yogananda

Death is not extinguishing the light; it is putting out the lamp because dawn has come. --Rabindranath Tagore

Our fear of death is like our fear that summer will be short, but when we have had our swing of pleasure, our fill of fruit, and our swelter of heat we say we have had our day. --Ralph Waldo Emerson

Life is just death in drag. -- Renegade Angel (Cartoon Network)

Even at our birth, death does but stand aside a little. And every day he looks towards us and muses somewhat to himself whether that day or the next he will draw nigh. --Robert Bolt

I would rather live and love where death is king than have eternal life where love is not. --Robert G. Ingersoll

Life is eternal and love is immortal; And death is only a horizon, And a horizon is nothing save the limit of our sight. --Rossiter W. Raymond

The day which we fear as our last is but the birthday of eternity. --Seneca

Be of good cheer about death and know this as a truth--that no evil can happen to a good man, either in life or after death. --Socrates

Is death the last sleep? No--it is the last and final awakening. --Sir Walter Scott

I only remember two kisses - the first and the last. The first, with my love and the last, with death. The first brought happiness and the last relief! --Srijit Prabhakaran

The difficulty, my friends, is not in avoiding death, but in avoiding unrighteousness; for that runs faster than death. --Socrates

To be idle is a short road to death and to be diligent is a way of life; foolish people are idle, wise people are diligent. --The Buddha

Death is well understood, it's life that isn't. --Tony Follari, Comedian

There is no death. No death, only change. Death is but to cease to be the same. --Unknown

Learn as if you were going to live forever. Live as if you were going to die tomorrow. --Unknown

One should die proudly when it is no longer possible to live proudly. --Unknown

We all labor against our own cure, for death is the cure of all diseases. --Unknown

The mystery of love is greater than the mystery of death. --Unknown

There will always be death and taxes; however, death doesn't get worse every year. --Unknown

We all to some extent meet again and again the same people and certainly in some cases form a kind of family of two or three or more persons who come together life after life until all passionate relations are exhausted, the child of one life the husband, wife, brother, sister of the next. Sometimes, however, a single relationship will repeat itself, turning its revolving wheel again and again. --William Butler Yeats, A Vision

Death is a very dull, dreary affair, and my advice to you is to have nothing whatsoever to do with it. --W. Somerset

For death is no more than a turning of us over from time to eternity. --William Penn

For life in the present there is no death. Death is not an event in life. It is not a fact in the world. --Wittgenstein

I'm not afraid of death; I just don’t want to be there when it happens. --Woody Allen

Death is a natural part of life. Rejoice for those around you who transform into the Force. Mourn them do not. Miss them do not. Attachment leads to jealously. The shadow of greed, that is. -- Yoda

************

Jokes

Here, Eat This Root

2000 B.C. - Here. Eat this root. 

1000 A.D. - That root is heathen! Here, say this prayer. 

1850 A.D. - That prayer is superstition. Here, drink this potion. 

1940 A.D. - That potion is snake oil. Here, swallow this pill. 

1985 A.D. - That pill is in-effective. Here, take this antibiotic. 

2000 A.D. - That antibiotic is artificial. Here, eat this root. 

************

How many Major Arcana Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?

All of them:

0) The Fool has already started before anyone else is ready.

1) The Magician assembles an array of objects that might be needed,

Displays them to best advantage and starts discussing how to go about it.

2) The High Priestess sits in the background, knowing one thing is

Missing but says nothing.

3) The Empress fusses around making sure it is safe and nobody gets hurt.

4) The Emperor tells everyone he thinks it should be done right now

And starts delegating responsibilities.

5) The Hierophant offers advice on the missing part after consulting

With the High Priestess.

6) The Lovers umm and ahh about what wattage bulb to put in this time.

7) The Chariot charges in and starts doing it himself regardless of

The others' protests.

8) Strength surreptitiously places what's needed into Chariot's hands

And gets it done her way.

9) The Hermit suggests a candle in a lamp would provide light in the

Meantime.

10) The Wheel of Fortune laughs and reminds everyone that the light

Will need changing again in the future.

11) Justice works out whose turn it is to change the light and whether

The division of labor is being delegated fairly.

12) The Hanged Man contemplates how darkness can change our lives.

13) Death points out mournfully that this was bound to happen and how

Everything ends.

14) Temperance tells Death to chill out, it all evens up in the end.

15) The Devil tries to make the others take responsibility for causing

 The light to blow and creates bad feelings all round.

16) The Tower suddenly starts ripping out the original light fixture

So he can create a whole new more basic look.

17) The Star marvels at new beginnings and says how much she's looking

Forward to having the light working again.

18) The Moon continually offers conflicting advice, confusing everyone

 Until she wanders off to the relief of all.

19) The Sun wants to redesign the whole room around a much brighter light.

20) Judgment examines the bulb to see whether it truly was its time to

 Blow and ponders whether the bulb can be recycled.

21) The World suggests that any problems with the light are temporary:

 We had light once, we will have it again, and suggests focusing on the

Bigger picture.

Meanwhile, the Fool has already finished changing the light bulb and

Is off doing his own thing.

Author unknown.

************

Humor

A Pagan In Hell

A Pagan dies and, to his great surprise, he finds himself standing before some pearly gates. 

St. Peter asks him, “May I help you??"

The Pagan asks, "Where am I?" 

Peter says, "You're at the gates of heaven." 

The Pagan says, "But I don't believe in heaven." 

Peter frowns at him. "You're one of those Pagans, aren't you?" 

"Yes. I believe I'm in the wrong place; I'm supposed to go to Summerland." 

Peter says, "Sorry. We took over Summerland, and it's temporarily closed for remodeling." 

"What should I do now?" 

Peter says, "Well, since we don't allow Pagans in heaven, you have to go to hell. Sorry. Just follow that path that leads downward and to the left." 

The Pagan walks down to hell, where the gates are standing open. He walks in and finds beautiful meadows, happy animals, and clear streams of water. 

He walks on in and begins exploring, and after a few minutes a courtly gentleman walks up to him and bows politely. "Hello, I'm Satan. You must be the guy that St. Peter phoned me about. Are you a Pagan?" 

"Yes, I am. What's going to happen now?" 

Satan says, "Well, the fishing's pretty good, if you enjoy that sort of thing. There's a little refreshment stand down the road. And I believe the Pagan meeting grounds are right over the next hill." 

Suddenly, a hole opens up in the sky above, and a yawning chasm opens directly underneath it. The stench of sulphur fills the air. Hundreds of screaming, tortured souls drop down into the flaming pit, which immediately closes up with a thud. 

The Pagan, hardly believing what he just saw, asks Satan, "And what was THAT ???"

Satan rolls his eyes. "Oh, just ignore them. They're Christians; they wouldn't have it any other way." 

************

On the Other Side

A Wiccan Priestess dies, and is greeted on the Otherside by her grandmother. 

After being settled in, the Priestess is given the grand tour by the grandmother, who shows her many places and introduces her to many fellow spirits. 

They see Druids cavorting in sacred groves, Norsefolk feasting and fighting in a banquet hall, Buddhists chanting in a pagoda, Native Americans dancing; everywhere the newcomer is made welcome, and makes new friends. 

Then the Priestess and her grandmother came to a large, dark, stone building, within which they hear the sound of singing. “Shhh” said the grandmother, with her finger to her lips, “Be very quiet.” 

So the two tip-toe past, and when they have gone on a little way the Priestess asks about this curious building. 

“Oh” says the grandmother “That’s just the Christians –they think they’re the only ones here.” 

************

You might be a Redneck Pagan... 

If you think "widdershins" refers to the calves of the bereaved lady next door.... 

If you think fetch deer is a command you give yer dawg.... 

If you think a goblet is a young turkey.... 

If you think Drawing Down the Moon means demolishing the outhouse.... 

If you call your coven mates "Bud" and "Sis".... 

If you think a Great Rite is turning onto County Road 13.... 

If your Quarter candles smell like kerosene.... 

If you pronounce "athame" as "athaym" and "Samhain" as "Sammon" or "Sam-hayn".... 

If you think a "Sidhe" is a girl.... 

If your idea of the "Goddess" is the Coors Swedish Bikini Ski Team.... 

If your Bard plays the banjo.... 

If your 'Long Lost Friend' really IS.... 

If your lawn is decorated with at least one, preferably two or more, plastic pink flamingos, whom you regard as your familiars.... 

If your Wand of Power is a cattle prod.... 

If your ceremonial belt has your name on the back and a belt buckle bigger than your head.... 

If you call the quarter by invoking "Billy, Joe, Jim and Bob".... 

If you call the Gods by hollerin' "Hey y'all, watch me!".... 

If your favorite robe has the logo of a manufacturer of major farm equipment on the back.... 

If you've ever harvested ritual herbs with a weed whacker.... 

If your ritual staff is a double barrel shotgun.... 

If your ritual garments include any one of the following: plaid flannels, long johns, a pistol belt, or cowboy boots.... 

If you've ever blessed chewing tobacco or snuff.... 

If your ritual wine is Maddog 20/20, Night Train or White Lady 21.... 

If the instructions to get to your Covenstead include the words "After you turn off the paved road".... 

If your altar-cloth is a rebel flag.... 

If you use junk cars to mark the four corners of your circle.... 

If your Eternal Flame just happens to be under a still.... 

If you use an engine block for an altar.... 

If your High Priestess is your cousin - as well as your wife.... 

If, when drawing down the moon, you say, "Ya'll come on down, ya hear?".... 

If your pickup truck has an athame rack....

If your crystal ball made of polystyrene (i.e., a bowling ball)....

If your High Priestess has a spittoon on her altar..

************

Redneck Pagan Charge of the Goddess 

(Tune: The Beverly Hillbillies by E. Scruggs) (Lyrical adaptation by Hare) 

Now listen to the words of the Great Star Mother,

In days long past called by one name or tuther,

"I am your Mammy, Queen of Earth, Air, Fire, Sea,

So you better quit your yappin' an' listen to me."

(Isis, that is...Astarte...Cerridwen)

"When the Moon is full, bright as a silver dollar,

Open up yer winder an give your Mam a hollar.

I'll hear you callin, jest as clear as a bell,

An I'll come a runnin an visit fer a spell."

(Circle, that is...Esbat...Draw down the Moon)

"Now y'all listen up, 'cause I'd hate to be a bitch,

When we have our shindigs t'aint none should wear a stitch.

Y'all will eat an' drink an' dance an' love, to show that you're free,

'Cause all acts of pleasure are sacred to me."

(Skyclad, that is...Great Rite...Cakes an' Wine)

"If you wanna know my secrets, then look in your own hide,

'Cause if what you seek ain't there, well, it won't be found outside.

The greatest Mysteries t'aint really dread nor dire,

I'm with you at the start, and at the end of desire."

(That's right, listen to your heart! Y'all will come back now, y'hear!)